typical American atheist: how can you be a secular Jew?

secular Jew: do you celebrate Christmas and Easter?

typical American atheist: yes

secular Jew: so it's exactly like that, except with Jewish holidays and culture

typical American atheist: but that's religious... help, i can't comprehend this

secular Jew: so i'm a secular Jew in the same sense that you're a secular Christian

typical American atheist: i'm not a secular Christian. i'm just a normal American atheist.

secular Jew: but you celebrate Christmas and Easter

typical American atheist: yeah but those are secular holidays

secular Jew: they're religious holidays that you observe in a secular way for cultural reasons, your culture being Christian

typical American atheist: no, my culture is atheist

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